


For I Will Sin

by nothingeverlost



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV), Ravenous (1999), The Tournament (2009)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Cannibalism, Crossover, F/M, M/M, Prayer, Pre-smut, Priests, Religion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-12
Updated: 2012-07-12
Packaged: 2017-11-09 19:35:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/457584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nothingeverlost/pseuds/nothingeverlost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Temptation of the flesh has never been like this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For I Will Sin

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this started as a crack drabble crossing over Ives (played by Robert Carlyle in the movie Ravenous) with Father MacAvoy (played by Robert Carlyle in the movie The Tournament) and tossing in Belle (who is in love with Robert Carlyle's character Rumpelstiltskin in Once Upon a TIme.)
> 
> It's probably now the prolog to a longer fic.
> 
> Warning: This fic is taboo times three (at least) Deals with cannibalism, priests thinking about sex, and a brief comparison, if you chose to see it that way, of communion as cannibalism. There's a cannibalism/sex theme, and if there's more to this then threesome sex will probably be mentioned.

There is no chapel at Fort Anderson, but he finds a corner of the barn and kneels on the rough hewn wood stained a dark reddish brown. It’s been some time since there were animals in the barn; now there’s just the smell of hay gone to mold and rat droppings that are sure to be piled up in some corner now that there’s no barn cat to discourage them. He closes his eyes and tries to block it all out, tries to imagine that he’s kneeling on stone and facing light strained through colored glass.

“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I…” Here he falters, his clasped hands shaking. This time he can’t blame it on the need for a drink; there’d been cognac after dinner. Cognac and a conversation with his host that had driven him to seek council from one wiser than himself.

“I am tempted, Father.” But even as he makes the confession he doesn’t know which temptation weighs so heavily on his soul. He sees haunting blue eyes and chestnut curls, a woman with lips softer than any he’s known. Even now her taste lingers in his mouth. Even now he craves to taste her again, to give in this time to the desire to slip his tongue into her mouth. His skin prickles, and he knows that her mouth is not the only thing he craves.

He should leave this place, run away into the cold winter night. He has no right to tempt the innocent girl into anything. He has no right to give into the temptations of his host.

_Can you imagine what it would be like to never be sick again, Father MacAvoy? No longer a slave to the drink? No rotten liver turning your skin to yellow? You could be a strong man, doing God’s work. ‘The angels will come forth and take out the wicked from among the righteous.’ There are sinners, Father, among those traveling through this land. Greedy men. Wouldn’t the world be a better place if we culled them away from the rest?_

He knows the man is wrong. There is no sanctity in killing, no matter if it’s sinner or saint. This man, Ives, speaks to him with a devil’s tongue. His way is worse than the slow death of drink and guilt. So much worse. He has to stay strong, if not for himself at least for Belle. He has to make sure she gets away from this place.

“Help me, Jesus,” he begs, eyes tightly closed.

_He who eats My flesh and drinks My blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day._

He can almost see a communion table before him, but it’s not wine and bread stretched out before him. It’s Belle, holding up one hand, blood dripping down her finger. He can almost taste the salt and copper against his tongue.

“Please. Oh God, please help me.” His whole body is trembling, but he’s not sure if it’s the desire to run away or to that he’s resisting.

“I do so love the sight of a man on his knees.” A warm hand clasps his shoulder, steadying him. The voice is melodious; once upon a time he might have thought that an angel would have such a voice.

He’s not sure he believes in angels anymore. “I just needed…”

“I know what you need, Father.” The caress against his hair is almost tender. It’s been so long since anyone touched him like that. “All you need to do is admit it to yourself.”

“I can’t.” It takes everything he has not to open his eyes. The voice is mesmerizing enough without looking into those intense brown eyes.

“Shhhh… You think too much. Forget it tonight. Just come in and sit with us beside the fire. You don’t want Belle to get lonely, do you?” There’s a whisper of what might be just air or might be a kiss against his lips, and then silence. He’s alone again; when he opens his eyes the barn is almost black. Cold. He shivers, and stands.

“Bless me Father, for I have sinned.” He crosses himself before leaving. As he crosses the snow covered courtyard to the main building he can almost taste salt and copper on his lips.


End file.
